Alpine Hygiene Presents, Waterworld 2014: Boards, Beers, Bro’s and Babes.

No one likes a dirty ass.  There I said it.  But luckily for you neat freaks, germaphobes, porta potty bigots, body hair haters, and obsessive-compulsive types, I’ve been doing my research.

It turns out that having water carefully, but forcefully, shot into one’s nether regions has been around since the late 1600’s.  Now this phenomenon never quite caught on across the US, where apparently the use (albeit ineffective) of bleached paper has become the standard method of personal hygiene.  Remember the blue and pink options?

Now before you go hating, you gotta at least try it, a couple times.  The second try is a little less shocking, but yes it’s still awkward.  It always gets easier right?

Well here in the Pacific Northwest, we have our own form of personal sanitation, a hybrid technique that water sport enthusiasts AND skiers and snowboarders (close enough to late season snow) enjoy on an annual basis.  This method, often referred to as Pond Skimming, offers a cooling and refreshing experience while ensuring that your cracks and crevices are properly cleansed.  While this would never suffice for bidet purists, those of us more concerned with our adrenal systems agree that this is the choice activity during those hot days in the alpine.

All the images were taken over the course of a few days this past July.  The video edit premiers this fall in Seattle, during Snowboard Northwest’s film fest.  More info coming soon.

-Dick Butkus



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